Rayan was home as he always does on a Sunday, escaping the world just to find some time for himself. Today was something different, since he had got up from sleep, he was heavy. Though nothing major had happened but still he felt something was sinking.

He finished his usual chore of scanning the Sunday graffiti. Feeling restless he picked up his phone and opened the contact list. He browsed through 758 contacts on his phonebook list and kept the phone aside. There was not even a single person he would have wanted to talk. He was never so isolated.

It has been 10 months Neera had stepped out of his life, somewhere that exclusion excluded many things from Rayan’s life. He got up, he had a messed up table in front of him that he decided to clean off. The table was overflowing with books, he was an amid reader once. Rayan fixed the table and gave it a shake to move it back to the wall but it refused to move. As Rayan shook to check he saw a black diary blocking the way, he stretched his arms and got hold of it. 

Clearing the dust of it he sat down on the chair. It was Neera’s diary, his head flooded with memory of that day when Neera made a big issue about loosing her diary and Rayan screaming at her for crying over just a stupid diary. His line stormed his mind, “Neera, either you stop crying or I step out of the flat.” She was in tears.

He opened the diary with heavy heart, the first page was blank with just a letter- R. He flipped the page and it said,” Stupid diary You are lucky today as Rayan is busy and I have lot to say. Rayan understands me better but he doesn’t gets time from work these days, I don’t want to disturb him. So You are Rayan for me from now. May be someday he will be free then I will give him you to read so that he knows I love him :)……..

Something just flashed in front of Rayan’s eyes when he used get worked up with Neera trying to say something, which sounded stupid to him. He flipped on.

“Rayan once again you shouted on me what if I wanted to tell you about today’s movie, it did reminded me of you, whats so wrong in that. I am never telling you anything. But I know you were sleepy as you slept late because of office work, I do understand just that I feel like being little childish with you. I know if I tell you that I understand you now, all you will say not to acting But I know you how you feel bad always after arguing with me, such darling you are……..

A tear rolled out of Rayan’s eyes, all he was thinking how did Neera wrote this, he never mentioned that he felt wretched after talking badly to her. What was her degree of understanding and he just ruined it.

He cried his heart out at the next page which had Rayan’s and Neera’s picture at some coffee shop. There was something majorly different today in that picture which he had seen earlier also, while Rayan was looking at the camera & smiling, Neera had a smile on her face with her eyes staring at Rayan and not the camera….

The diary slipped off his hand.

Rayan got up and took his phone in his hand, he opened Neera’s contact, took a deep breath and dialed in.

The voice said…….,”the number you are tring to reach does not exist…..”